Life (doesn’t) ends when you become a mother.
My personal opinion is that both women and men today postpone the moment of conceiving a child because of the fact that there are too many cool things to do in the age in which we live, both the job and the free time, things on our own , and the idea of having a permanent attachment to „extra care” doesn’t delight anyone. So it’s the idea of choice.
Of course, between 20 and 30 years, there’s the pretext of money, or lack thereof, but once you get past that threshold, most people discover that the pretense was exactly that, just an excuse. Then people start to share in two categories: those who make babies „because they have to” or „because if not now when?” and the others who see their lives, and consider that a mistake greater than not having a child is to do one only for the sake of Make.
Because the rest, those people who really want children, don’t expect age, no financial situation, no perfect house, and often not even the right man or woman.
This year’s edition from Digital Divas I met Larisa, a mother with a baby who was present at the event. With duffel, bottled and milky, she found a little time for the diva in it. That’s what I was writing in that article. It’s much said I knew her, I just noticed her from behind and I had such a hold to take her picture because I know moms don’t all agree with posting pictures of their baby on the net. My luck was that she read my post and wrote and I took the opportunity and I proposed a blog interview, about what it’s like to be a mother and a digital diva these days. I admit, the reasons were a little personal, I mean, I wanted to hear something that would at least contradict my opinion on the subject, which I expressed above.
Larisa, talk to us please about your work as a blogger
I have a Blog I post all kinds of stuff, but 80% of it contains reviews about cosmetics, swatches of nail varnishes, makeup swatches, cosmetic news. The idea came to me in October 2009 when I felt like my mind was exploding if I didn’t share my opinion with the world about various products that we used and thought were brilliant!
How’s a day in your life going? How do you reconcile your job with your mommy job?
I’m currently on maternity leave and I don’t have to think about it. Otherwise, every Wednesday at 18 am I meet my husband at the youth subway station and from there we go nice by car to the University at the Dalles Go headquarters where they take the advanced styling course. There he sits with the little girl in the car for about 2 hours. Newer once a month in the weekend I go to a Yard to get rid of the tons of clothes that I have and then he comes with me and sits all day. And all asa…in life, I wake up, eat, sleep, watch TV, and if I have to go to any event, I put my wrap (ergonomic baby-bearing system) and we leave. Most of the time I can handle myself.
Why did you decide to come to Digital Divas? Did it seem difficult to „get out of the house” with such a small child? I ask this because there are people (including me) who unaware of the cause imagines a kind of „home record” after birth.
First of all, I really like these kind of conferences that all kinds of people come up with who can be said to have done something with their lives and have something to split. I think you always have something to learn from the experience of the people around you.
Secondly, I think that in Romania, if you have a trolley, you’re kind of on record. It’s super hard to get out of the building with them especially if you’re alone, so from the start that’s an impediment. And then the sidewalks occupied by Masini…si. But with all the ergonomic baby-carrying systems that give you so much freedom, it’s super easy to move absolutely anywhere, especially if you don’t have a driver’s license like me.
You said a mother had to „don’t forget her” and be „from time to time I’m a bit selfish to make her happy.” Do you think this is achieved by continuing the work and awareness that you have to take care of yourself or is it something that some mothers naturally come to do while others are more inclined towards „parenthood” feeling good like this?
You have to exercise and a husband in the back that reminds you that it’s okay to take another break and let him stay with Bebe. But on the other hand, from what I’ve been reading so far, there’s clearly a kind of mother who’s body and soul just for the baby. Everyone feels good.
Vis-à-vis what you thought about being a mother before you gave birth and your opinion now, would you say that experience changes your ideas significantly?
Experience makes me realize that there is life after I was born. That’s why I was most afraid…
What would you say to a woman who wishes her children but postpones the moment of fear that she will have to give up her life as she knows it today?
I think this thing depends a lot on the personality of every woman and the support the husband offers. If you know your poor angel and believe absolutely all the crap that everyone around you is telling you, it’s quite possible that your life is changing completely, otherwise you’ll be like me… relaxed and happy.
I may not have chosen the questions very well so as to express your opinion on this subject. What did I forget to ask you?
I’ve done a lot of conscience processes since I got this little interview from you, because it was me, and it’s still hard for me to accept that for the simple fact that I have a child, I’m not a victim of society. And it’s hard for me because I feel like society is condemning me if I don’t confirm it’s hard to have children and that you’re struggling to raise them. Well, if you think it’s hard and you have to torture yourself, stop having kids. And not to mention the harder you think it is, the harder it’s going to be. And the easier it is, the easier it’ll be. I’m not saying it’s the easiest thing I’ve ever done, but not the hardest. It’s simply different from everything else I’ve done so far. There are new feelings and lives. Experiences that you enjoy and experiences that scare you.
We are quite relaxed in terms of child growth, but as I said above, it is the pressure of society that stresses you and condemns you if you do not do as they know it is done. „Why don’t you have a cart? Why are you holding her in those rags, can’t you see she’s sitting cracanata? It’ll stay that way! He’s going to learn in his arms! Don’t you have money for socks? Why doesn’t he have a hat? Why he sleeps with you in bed, that’s how he’ll learn! Don’t you give the dog? Keep the cat? Are you going out with her so little? See that his ear has been bent and remains clapauga! ” Some people may feel a little intimidated by these constant Tatonari, but I don’t. And that’s why I kind of feel guilty… peak! To the other mothers. Because instead of me worrying about all this stuff, I enjoy my baby and that’s it. And when I’m not worried about the other moms, I have time for myself and my little pleasures like blog, Stilismul, events, dating friends and more.